#girls showed UP this year lemme tell ya

[leemarkies]

my top 10 gg kpop songs of 2022!

tagged by @njaems​ thank you mel!! idk who hasn’t done this already but if u see this and wanna do it lmk!

[backwzzds]

ೃ⁀➷ love me, connie springer (nsfw)

thinking about babydaddy!connie fucking you nice and slow after finding out you got stood up by your date. having little constentina (his idea, but tina for short) for the weekend, your precious angel just couldn’t keep her mouth shut to her daddy when you’d told her you were going on a small ‘dinner’

“she said dinner but that really means date, daddy.”

connie isn’t surprised. no one knew how to handle you beside him. i mean, he’s had your ass in place successfully for nearly ten years; only he was man enough to handle you, your mind, and most of all your body.

you loved connie like no other, you wanted no one else to be the father of your children. but you knew the streets would eventually take him away from you, and you just didn’t wanna stick around for that. not when you had a five year old girl depending on the both of you. connie looked for other ways to make bread without selling or doing anything…illegal but it was hard to match the stacks he was bringing home every weekend.

your separation was a one sided agreement anyways it seems. to you? you two were broken up. to connie delulu ass? you were his wife and you’re ‘smoking dick if you think ion belong to you and you’on belong to me.’

you didn’t even have any words for the absence of your so called ‘date.’. after an hour of waiting, you figured you’d call in to check on tina. ringing connie, your babyfather answered on the first ring, of course with a wood in his mouth and multiple lights on his face, signaling he was watching tv.

“hey,” your voice is solemn and low. you really were tired and ashamed to say anything more.

“hey mama, you okay?” connie’s hazel brown eyes quickly flick over to yours through the screen.

you shrug though he can’t see it. “i’m okay.” you admit. “just callin’ to check on my baby.” the frame was only on your face, but from the small shake of your hand, connie had managed to get a glimpse of a pretty black dress you’d sported, breasts looking three times as big as it usually did because of your sitting position. he could tell you dressed up for the night.

“yeah? she good, just upstairs sleepin’ right now. how was your date, pretty?” you hear connie turn down the tv in the background and give you his full intention.

you furrow your brows. “what? boy, how’d you know about it?”

your baby father blows out a huff of smoke and chuckles, flashing his gold canines. he wasn’t gon snitch on his lil informant princess. “i got my ways. tell me bout it baby.”

with a roll of your eyes, you let out a tired sigh and felt your shoulders sag. “wouldn’t know. the nigga never showed.”

connie furrows his own thick eyebrows. “what you mean? he told you he couldn’t come?” he asked. from the shake of your head, you see his face soften on the screen. “come over n’ smoke with me. lemme make you feel better.”

you kiss your teeth and throw your head back, already knowing where the conversation was headed. embarrassment flooded your expression. “you eating my pussy is not gonna make me feel better, constance.”

connie kissed his teeth and waved you off dismissively. “you’on know that.”

a blush can’t help but creep its way onto your brown cheeks. “i’m supposed to be staying away from you, ya know.”

connie gives you a knowing grin, shamelessly flexing the two deep dimples in his cheeks that constentina inherrited from him. “yeah? how’s that going for you, mama?”

“obviously not good because i’m actually considering your offer of being a booty call tonight?” you laugh.

“come onnn mama, tina’s sleep, i got a wood rolled for you and i want you here.” your ex compromised with a kiss of his teeth. “lemme rub ya feet and all on ya butt i promise you’ll feel better.

“i’m tired and don’t feel like driving, con,” you whine in the same tone. you knew if he didn’t have your daughter he’d already be at your door, but you refused to risk waking her up in a car ride over here.

connie rolls his eyes and puts you on pause for the moment. a minute later he comes back on screen and takes a pull of his backwood. “your uber on the way baby.”

“ooh daddy,” you cried, trying your hardest to breathe straight. “you know i cum fast like this, oh shit,” connie had your legs spread wide open, forcing your huge tits up against the bottom of your face as he pumped in and out of you.

“you like that mama, like when i fuck you nice and slow? all romantic n’ shit?” connie teased. tears streamed down your face and he wasted no time in kissing them from your pretty face.

you’re too far in euphoria to even fully comprehend exactly what he’s saying. “yes, i love when you stroke this pussy so deep daddy.”

connie holds your breasts up damn near to your face and takes his time sucking on each of your nipples, making sure to stretch and pull it all the way back as far as it could go, grinning at the sound of it snapping back toward you. “you’on need no one else to love you like this but me, you heard?”

you can’t help but shake your head, the small responsible part of you left that hadn’t been fucked out by connie yet (though he was close) was slowly bringing you to reality. “no,” you respond.

“nah, nah, dead that shit or imma stop,” your ex threatened, straightening his back out so he stood tall, yet still very deep inside your gummy walls. you can’t help but stare down the tattoos that littered his body; many dedicated to you and your shared daughter. “you grippin’ me so tight baby, boutta make me cum, fuck,” connie throws his head back and whines. “tell me you’re mine n’ we gonna get back together.”

“no, con,” your words were saying one thing, but the cream ring of your arousal forming around connie’s tanned dick was betraying everything leaving your mouth. “w-we’re we’re toxic—oooh, yes, right there right there!”

suddenly, a large pair of hands come to wrap around your neck, gripping lightly. “tell me you’re mine or im not fuckin’ this pussy,” he orders. “you know i don’t be bluffing, mama. ‘specially when it come to your spoiled ass déjame oírte decirlo.”

more tears fall from your eyes as you feel your lower region bubble in evstasy. “con—“

“say it if you wanna cum.” connie’s grip around your neck tightens as he inevitably starts to babble. he was not gonna let up off you no matter what. “come on mama, say it n lemme give you another baby. gonna make you a mama all over again, want you so full of my babies, pretty—fuck,” he breathed out. “you know daddy sorry, you gonna forgive him?”

it wasn’t until connie started to add his thumb rubbing circles around your clit did you finally fold and give in. “oh fuck, yes! yes yes i forgive you con—please—“

“go head and cum mami, te quiero.” connie breathed out, feeling his own orgasm approach. “te amo joder joder por favor dame más hijos mami te estoy rogando déjame correrte dentro de ti,” the man curses into the atmosphere as he strokes himself in you a few more times.

“yes yes,” you nod in response to his pleads of cumming in you. a nanosecond later, connie’s cumming deep into you until he ends up shooting nothing but blanks. you’re full to the brim to the point where drops of his cum couldn’t help but ooze out between your puffy cunt.

“dio mio.”

[darlingdaisyfarm]

feeling pretty low today, so i’m turning to these two old men for a little comfort

nsfw under the cut, fem!reader

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ Stan likes to call you:

sweetheart, honeybun, doll face and on occasion baby girl. when he’s feeling extra bold? princess — always with that unmistakable smirk

calls you “my good luck charm" if you help him out in the Shack, especially when he’s trying to swindle a tourist and you flash a pretty smile.

✦ “c’mere, darlin’. can’t let a fine gal like you walk around without her prince.”

✦ “ah, y’know, you’re the only reason I don’t go completely nuts in this crazy town. sometimes, doll, I think yer my only sane thought all day.” said so casually as if it’s not gonna hit you right in the heart

✦ if you get hurt (even the tiniest scratch), he’s going into dad mode: “who do I gotta knock some sense into, huh?” even if you’ll tell him it was just a clumsy accident, he’ll grumble, “well, now I’m the one hurt. bein’ all worried like that. you’re killin’ me, kid.” 

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ Ford likes to call you:

“dearest” when he’s feeling soft, sweetheart, darling, honey, baby

he’ll whisper “love” against your temple when he thinks you’re drifting to sleep, his voice quiet and reverent like it’s sacred to him

starlight – Ford’s been out in those other dimensions, faced down monsters and madness, but he says he’s never found anything so bright, so grounding. “c’mere, starlight, I’m not finished admiring you.”

༄ “don’t laugh, but. . . I’d chase you across universes, even if it took me another thirty years. no dimension is worth exploring without you by my side.”

༄ if you’re reading one of his journals, Ford’ll slide up behind you, his hands on your shoulders as he murmurs, “curious, are we? so, what do you think of my work?”

༄ he’s not a show-off, not by any means, but catch him fixing up a machine? he’ll lift his gaze to you, smiling. “I could teach you, you know. but you’d have to be a very attentive student.”

༄ oh, if Ford wrote about you in his journal, you know it’d be scrawled between notes on trans-dimensional theories and arcane symbols, the ink smudged in places where he hesitated, where his pen hovered just so before he let himself write the truth

“Strange anomalies detected….. not in the temporal or metaphysical sense, but in a far more personal dimension. Subject exhibits an inexplicable gravitational pull, distinct from any gravitational force I've previously documented. When I observe her, I feel an uncharacteristic deviation in my thought patterns, an accelerated heartbeat not caused by heightened blood pressure or adrenaline, but by… attraction. Confounding. She’s somehow eclipsing the most rational parts of my mind.”

And, because Ford’s words can’t capture the whole of it, there’d be tiny sketches of you, like half-finished thoughts.

nsfw

what Stan says during sex:

“Damn, honey, you’re makin’ an old man feel young again. Don’t stop.”

“You’re makin’ me wanna be a better man, but not right now, baby, not right now.”  

“Mmm, there it is— yeahh, keep doin’ that. . . feels so good, darlin’, you got no idea.”

“Makin’ all these pretty noises, huh? Lemme hear ‘em, baby. Don’t hold back on me.”

“You’re somethin’ else, y’know that? I’m gonna be thinkin’ ‘bout that pussy all week.”  

“Fuckin’ hell, don’t know if I’m gonna last much longer with you doin’ that.”  

“Look at ya, so needy for me, beggin’ to be filled. You got me so riled up, I can barely think— ah, f-fuck. . .”

 Ford:

“Ohh— sweetheart, you feel even better than I imagined, i’ve waited for this.”  

“I need you so much it scares me.”  

“You’re brilliant, utterly captivating. . . yesyesyes, keep moving like that, please.”  

“Tell me exactly what you want, darlin, I need to hear you say it.”  

“I never thought I’d feel this way again; you’ve woken something in me.”  

“God, I can’t— can’t believe you’re letting me have you. I need you so much, it hurts.”

“Mmm, god, yes. . . yes, you’re mine, all mine. . . can’t believe I get to have you like this.”

“O-oh god, you feel so tight around me, sweetheart, I can’t-can’t hold back!”

“Please, oh, please— just, just like that, don’t stop, keep. . . keep going. . .”

“I can’t help myself; I need you. I want to feel you around me.”

“You’re so fucking beautiful when you’re like this. I can’t take my eyes off you.”

“Oh gosh, I need you to take me deeper. Please, baby.”

“Tell me how good it feels; I want to hear it.”

“You feel incredible. I could stay buried inside you forever.”

[chaosandmarigolds]

okay it has been the longest time since I've asked for a request but I freaking LOVE THE WAY YOU WRITE!! So I have a Simon riley request. You can really run off with my idea and write it however you want but Ive had an idea in my head about Simon and the reader adopting because reader or Simon can't have kids and I want to know how he'd handle a kid who's probably been thru some stuff to end up in the foster/adopting system.

ANYWAYS ILYSM keep up your amazing work 😍😍

(no cause I actually screamed omg thank you so much for your kind words they truly mean the world to me <333 )

Adoption! Simon Riley Who had zero doubt on that he wanted children with you, even though he was terrified of failing them he wanted to try

Simon Riley! Who took you to all of the doctors appointments and the testing and the trails and never once mentioned how expensive it is

Simon Riley who was probably the only person a bit more crushed than you when the doctor told you both that it wouldn't be possible to have children of your own.

Simon Riley who let the matter go under the radar for a few months before you walk into the bedroom, tablet to chest

"i'm gonna say something and I need you to be open to it."

He blinks a few times as he sets his book down on his lap, "Should I be scared?"

"No. But..." You hold out the tablet, showing him the adoption application you had half filled out, "I mean there's thousands of kids who-who need a family an-and-"

"Finish it up, why don't ya- lemme get the bank statements, yeah?"

Simon Riley! who would rather go back on deployment than have more people walk through his home while making judgments on if it was 'child friendly'

Simon Riley! Who sat up with you every time you were waiting for an update, watching easy going bake shows on the sofa with the laptop email service open on the coffee table in front of you

Simon Riley! Who was a little bit disgusted when the agent sat you both down with the files of children in need, because he did have half a mind to just take them all

"Now I know you both told me you were looking for a baby, and I understand that however the waitlist for that is incredibly long and ultimately it is the mother's choice in that situation," The agent's eyes go to Simon, almost as if to say 'no mother would ever choose that' and she pushes the file to you, "And I always push for the adoption of some of the older kids. There's no pressure."

Your eyes narrow to the folders in front of you and you gulp down, hands shakily going to the folder in front of you and pulling it to your lap, all the while you could tell Simon was just still a little confused by the statement the agent had made before. However, you humored it, flipping through the photos and the tragic backstories that made your eyes water, until you open one that caught your attention, two children sat in the photoinsteadd of one.

Name: Macey-Ann Adams

Age: 11 years

Name: Taylor Kate Adams

Age: 24 months

"Si..." You didn't tell that your voice was muffled by a bit of tears and you hold the file over to your husband, who looked over the pictures, taking you slight interest. So he lightly takes the file and then looks up at the agent.

"These two?" He speaks as softly as he was able to.

The agent looks at the file and then a frown appears on her face, "Macey, she...she's a troubled girl, on her fourth foster home, and she's jumping schools, I would not recommend her."

with a shuttered breath you breath out, "But...but she's just a kid- can...can we meet her and Taylor?"

Simon Riley did extensive research as soon as he got home, finding the articles from the local newspaper on the two girls who were so severely abused by their father that they wouldn't look the police officer in the eye

Simon Riley who was beginning to think it wouldn't be a good idea until they met the girls at the local park

Simon Riley who saw so much of himself in that little girl it made him almost puke

Simon Riley who got over himself when he saw your beaming face as you held Taylor, helping her get the cherry blossom from the tree

Simon Riley who would be lying if he said he wasn't estatic when you were approved for the adoption

Simon Riley who tried to get to know Macey but the girl was quiet, self suffiecnt, she was him

"You're taking Taylor." Macey mutters as she sits on the swing, watching you with her baby sister

Simon squints against the sun and sits down in the swing beside her, and then he looks to you, a smile on his lips for a moment, "Not jus' her."

To that the eleven year old looks at him, a frown on her face, "What? People want babies. Taylor is a baby."

There was a long silence and Simon looked down at his boots, "You like trampolines?"

Macey blinked, "I do."

"Gonna buy you a trampoline for the backyard when the court says it's all over."

Another pause, "You're taking both of us?"

"Figured you'd wanna stay with your lil' sis."

"I-kinda....thanks, Mister Riley."

"Simon. You can call me Simon, or...whatever you wan, and' we gotta get a move on your sister was wan'n a ice cream."

Simon Riley! Who takes careful care in helping Macey unpack

Simon Riley! Who takes the girls shopping every weekend until he thinks they have everything they need

Simon Riley! Who loves his girls more than anything else in the world

( I hope this is good and honestly this is so cute I may write a more in-depth one shot type of thing. Comments and feedback make my day! annnd yeah! that's it <33

[bunnys-kisses]

it came to me on a sunny day - dad!simon - inspired by the song 'my girl' by the temptations

maybe i'll make this a whole fic? idk... lemme know <3

telling simon you were pregnant was nothing but a shock. but it was inevitable. you two weren't the best when it came to protection, so one night of passion led to the conception of your daughter.

you mostly wore simon's jacket due to you being pregnant most of the winter. you kept telling yourself that you'd get a jacket to accommodate the growing bump, but by the time you got around to it, simon's sweatshirts kept you warm enough. even though simon still put a hat on you every time you left the flat.

simon just loved the swell of your belly, he always smiled when he felt the movement of your daughter. he would lie on the couch, legs dangled off the edge in an uncomfortable manner to be closer to your belly.

if you both weren't so worried about protecting simon's identity, you would've put him online to tout him as 'father of the year'. in your second trimester you did get married at the court house. it was an informal affair, something to put on paper. he promised that the two of you could have the whole celebration after the baby was born.

"simon." you said, "watching johnny choke on a fry that kyle threw into his mouth after the ceremony is worth more than some stupid party." you then leaned over to kiss him, your ring felt comfortable on your finger.

however as you entered your third trimester and your fingers became swollen, you had you wear your ring around your neck on a chain. when you felt about it, simon simply said, "chain's closer to your heart."

when summer came your little rosemary was born. she was born in the end of june, your friend remarked that she was a cancer sign. simon was there the whole way, even when you punched him when a particular hard contraction hit.

"i'm gonna kill you, simon." while that wasn't the first time he ever heard that phrase, it was the only time it ever made a shiver run down his spine. but he was your rock the entire way, the full ten hours it took to delivery rosemary riley.

she came out screamin' though, a far cry from the silent nature of her father. you had never seen simon cry too many times, but the first time he held the pudgy newborn, you could see him hold back the tears.

"simon."

"yeah?" his gaze didn't leave his daughter.

you patted him on the arm, "you can cry, no one's going to judge you." you knew he always felt like he had to be the protector of his little family. but when you leaned over, exhausted yourself, and kissed him on the cheek. the emotion flooded out of him.

you were parents now.

simon took to being a father really well, despite his nervousness (that he never showed on his face) to end up like his own father. he realized that it was a lot easier to be good parent than he thought.

"i love you both." he often said to you, "thank you."

he said that you gave him a second chance at life. after everything, the pain that caused him to shut down and become a killer for the military. you and rosemary allowed the coldness to turn warm. while he still was intimidating outside the home, in the safety of where you lived, he was able to be the caring parent he was denied growing up.

"rose." he said in his low voice, "where are ya goin'." then picked up the toddler with ease so she didn't topple the television on top of her, "you can see it just fine over here." then carried her back to the couch.

you both did your best to not raise an ipad baby, rather you made good use of the second hand printer you had and let you colour and draw to her hearts content. and books. so many books.

"that's a bear, rose." you said as you pointed to the drawing in the book you were reading to her before bed, "b-e-a-r."

"B!Ear!" she chirped as she kicked out her little legs under the covers. she was a very smart girl.

she gets it from me, simon said jokingly.

of course he often let his little rosemary colour in his tattoos with washable markers while they're sitting outside on a nice summer's day a year or two down the line. the little girl is still getting used to holding markers and colours outside the lines of the tattoos. but simon finds it endearing.

nothin' is gonna hurt his girls.

"honey." you said.

"yes?"

"i think we're giving rose a sibling a lot sooner than we expected." <3

(i wanted to write something tender on this beautiful spring day. if it's sunny where you are today soak in the rays!)

[shotmrmiller]

Capt’ Mactavish’s wife *running* out the house for her girls night with ‘09 reader because Johnny can’t keep his hands to himself when she’s dressed up.

She’s taken to a squirt bottle. He was kissing on her neck from behind the couch. Mauling her when she whipped it out the first time. He fell back with an ‘ACK!’ and a loud thud and she’s just like ‘that’s what you get for acting like a horny teen!’

“You were tryin’ for a bairne yea? I’ve been reading up on positions! Lemme show you!” And she’s just like- I’m not going to survive this, am I? “I can pick up where we left off hen! Trust!”

I imagine Captain Mactavish went for a woman who is *younger* than himself. She’s a few years older than Soap, but she grew used to her grizzled ol’ guy and his routine! She’s old at heart now! He couldn’t immediately get it up every 3 minutes. But! He would take longer to cum, so the sessions were more intimate.

Soap? God, she’s not used to this! She needs water! They’re going into 5, 6 rounds and she’s blacking out! But, she doesn’t want to because she’s ‘scared’ he’ll keep going!!! She enjoys his enthusiasm, it’s sweet to see this part of her Johnny that she didn’t get to experience much! but, GOD DAMN *sprays squirt bottle*

…”this a subliminal message lass? This your mind trick to tell me you can squirt? Shit lass! Let’s get on that! Lemme figure it out myself!” Just talking you through the entire thing….

He’s totally asking what the baby names you were looking at were, while balls deep. what your registry looked like as he prods your cervix. Do ya’ have a Pinterest board for what ya’ want the nursery to look like? Add him, please? As he shoots his load deep. “You want a girl, or boy lass? What’re we havin’? Tell me what to give ya.” He cooed as he holds your legs up, elevated so it TAKES.

“I can pick up where we left off hen! Trust!” <- foul. foul foul foul i need him.

Captain MacTavish would totally be the sly type. Oh, the words he whispers into the ears of the ladies should be illegal. I believe he had his fun in his youth and was definitely a little older, but then he saw his wife and said, "Gunnae marry that, I am."

Wife doesn't see the similarities in their pursuit of her because one was suave about it. the other just doesn't care about what he looks like in the eyes of others, and she highkey loves that— just won't admit it.

I love love love that Capt. Soap is passionate when they have sex, but reg Soap is like im gonna get you pregnant, money back guarantee.

"Whadye mean tha' ye need a break? We've jus' begun, bonnie..." he says that 5 rounds in. Pussy is swollen, hole is abused, and she's been stuffed with so much cum it's no longer staying inside even at the angle he has her in to keep it in. She makes a mental note to (ask jeeves) if shooting blanks after finishing multiple times back-to-back is a thing.

She finds squirting embarrassing, as does when her cunt gets air inside but Soap??? Living his best life with it.

"Dinnae be embarrassed, hen, i love it when yer pussy talks back to me." <- this is so embarrassing my face is on fire

He definitely tries to get her to squirt, but he loses all patience because 'Ye just feel so good around my fingers, I cannae wait any longer.'

Soap tells her that his family has twins as he pumps her full of cum, and that he already has a list with names if she wants to go over it sometime later today.

He tells her that he's quit drinking, he's always hydrating, and that he takes his daily vitamins just to give his seed a better chance.

[eerna]

I would love for you to share your thoughts on Barbie. My problem with it is same I have with Greta Gerwig, I always end up wanting more than what was presented in her movies. I liked lady bird, little women was okey, but I feel like Barbie was a lot and nothing at the same time. I did not hate it, and though it was funny but it was just okey. Also the feminism of the movie felt very superficial.

No prob~ Aside from Barbie, the only Greta thing I saw is Little Women, and lemme tell ya, watching that movie by myself at a cinema and crying my way through it was a formative experience. I think it's because that movie specifically spoke to my experience with romance SO perfectly. Having someone who is your other half, but in a completely platonic way (and how difficult that can be), rejecting any chance of romance that you encounter with anyone, regretting it years later because suddenly you are all alone and can't help wonder what could have been (not out of true romantic interest but shattering fear that you will die unpaired), having to conform to romantic ideals of everyone around you, but still holding onto your own beliefs... Oh man. I think the amount of "JO SHOULD HAVE ENDED UP WITH LAURIE" people in the comment section of every instagram reel I get rec'd shows that it's a theme that is not often presented in media, and one that is niche enough for most people not to understand. It shows the imperfection of one specific female experience that is difficult to understand for some. If you get it, you get it. If you don't, the movie won't beat you over the head with its point.

Barbie is the exact opposite. Its main goal is glaringly simple and universal for women, but it won't shut up about it and beats you over the head with it. I agree with you, it was a funny movie, but any and all attempt at heartfelt honesty were insanely bad. I disagree with the counter-criticism that it shouldn't get dragged just because it's a Feminism 101 movie, because it is a BAD Feminism 101 movie that is a terrible introduction into feminist thought. And the reason for that is CAPITALISM!!! See, the movie is incredibly aware it has to be marketable to as many people as possible to make a shit ton of money, and every single decision made about it conforms to that. That's why the feminism is incredibly surface level and inoffensive ("Women can be sad! Women don't have to be perfect all the time!"). That's why it glamorizes the role of consumerism in the female experience ("The CEO of Mattel is just a himbo doing his best to make women like themselves! If Barbie didn't exist and little girls couldn't buy 10000 differently clothed versions of the same doll, they would never have the imagination to make their dreams come true! Seeing yourself in purchasable products is what creates your idea of your identity!"). The radicalization of men and the male-female dynamic doesn't work because the movie is completely unaware that the Ken uprising plot makes no sense because they are the ones who resemble our society's idea of women more closely - they are both caricatures of housewives and trophy-partners, but also the oppressors who accept patriarchy out of nowhere, without any real discussion of WHY it happens to men or women. It's not a coincidence that the audiences responded the best to the Ken characters - they are simply way more engaging and interesting that the Barbies.

So yeah. My thoughts on the movie can be summed up as "A movie can't be both feminist and a defense of capitalism".

[honey-on-your-tongue]

Okay so ive got this idea its like a lot older jake and younger reader (like 20+) and she goes thru her first heat but she is very innocent and she doesnt know why does it hurt THERE and jake sees her going thru pain and asks whats wrong and she tells him it hurts there and she asks if he knows a way to heal her and when he takes off her lioncloth shes shy and closes her tights but the second he starts fingering she starts to moan and beg for more and he fucks her dumb ykyk🫣🤭I’ve tought of this while in the bus going to a dance competition lmao😭😭

I hope it went well in your competition baby!!

Dilf Jake to the rescue again 😩😩😩

Didn't proofread sooo if you see any mistakes, no you didn't

-----

You're supposed to be on your way to train, but it hurts. It feels like something warm is spreading over your body, making your womb coil with a burning ache, a wetness smear over your thighs. You've already missed over three training session with the oloeyktan, and you don't think he'll be particularly thrilled.

Yet, today, you decide that if anyone can help you, it's him. He's gotta be extremely wise if he's the oloeyktan, right? Jake Sully is no dummy, you're sure he'll know what's wrong with you.

As you approach the clearing where you always train, you catch a wiff of Jake's scent and it sends a sharp yearning through you, straight between your legs. You mewl, pressing your thighs together as the pain increases.

Jake smells you a mile off. You've missed your last training sessions, but he still waits at your designated place in hopes that you'll show. And, from the smell of it, you indeed will. The moment you step into the clearing, Jake realizes why you've been skipping your lessons.

You're in heat.

When you come into view, Jake can already tell you're suffering deeply. Your ears are folded back, your pupils blown wide, and the scent of your slick is sweet and alluring.

“Hey, kid,” he greets, trying to keep his cock from hardening at your scent. “What happened to ya?”

“It hurts,” you whine, making a face as you approach him.

“What hurts?”

You blush softly, shy, before moving a hand to your pussy and cupping it. “Here,” you say quietly, lowly.

Jake can almost feel his heart jump out of his chest. He's got two options: he can be the mature man he is and tell you, a 22 year old, exactly what's happening, and send you to Mo'at for some herbs to help ease the pain; or, he can be the horny ass he is and help you through your heat his way.

Either way, he figures, he's helping you. What's the difference between both if the outcome benefits you?

And, he decides, it wouldn't hurt if it benefitted him at the same time.

“Lemme see,” he says, nodding at the ground. “Lie down for me, yeah?”

You look scandalized and unsure, a little afraid.

“Come on, kid. Trust me,” he insists, and after a few more seconds of hesitance, you comply.

You lie on the floor, the soft grass tickling your back and your ass as you plant your feet on the ground. Jake kneels in front of you, undoing your loincloth and tossing it aside.

Your knees are pressed together, stopping him from getting a good look, and he says, “I need you to spread your legs, girl. Don't you want me to help you?”

You nod slowly and open your thighs, revealing your swollen, soaked pussy. Jake's cock twitches under his loincloth at the sight of your cunt, and he just aches to fuck you.

Jake's eyes grow predatory, his pupils dilating, and the way he's studying you makes you squirm, shy. You press your thighs together, murmuring something unintelligible, and Jake tsks quietly.

He grabs your thighs and pushes them apart, revealing your pussy once again. The scent of your heat is even thicker now, and it makes a soft growl leave his lips.

“How long has it been hurting for, girl?” he asks, one of his hands wandering higher up your thigh, inching towards your cunt.

You struggle to reply, “Days.”

“How many days?” he questions as his fingers brush over your warm cunt, rubbing against your clit.

You gasp, surprised, and then mewl quietly as the ache in your womb finds a drop of relief. “I don't-don't know,” you manage, nails digging into the ground below.

“I see,” he hums, running his middle and index fingers between your folds, spreading them open before teasing your entrance. “Luckily, this has an easy fix.”

“It does?” you question, voice breathy.

“Want me to show you?”

Your big doe eyes are wide, innocent and curious. You nod eagerly. “Please, Jake. Help me.”

He chuckles quietly. “Alright, kid. I need you to relax, okay? Take a deep breath and just talk with me, hm?”

“Okay,” you say slowly as his middle finger traces the edge of your entrance.

“I trust you know where babies come from?” he jokes, and you blush, big doe eyes avoiding his dark gaze.

“Yes,” you say shyly, and Jake slides his finger into you, making you gasp softly.

“Well, what's going on with you has a lot to do with the birds and the bees,” he says, curling his finger upward and touching a swollen spot within you that makes your legs jerk. “Your body is asking for a baby,” he explains.

Through the pleasure, you look confused. “Why?”

“You're physically ready to start having kids, and you're extremely fertile right now, which is why you feel that ache inside of you that needs to be relieved.”

You fold your ears back as he slides a second finger into you. “And will it go away—ah, mphf—after what you-you're doing to me?”

He chuckles softly. “No, you need to get withchild for it to stop,” he informs you.

You groan, somewhere between frustrated and overcome by pleasure. Jake's fingers are good, they stretch you open, his thumb pressing against a soft nub that has your hips trembling. But they're not enough. You need something else, something longer, thicker, something that can take the ache away.

“Need more,” you whine, baring your teeth. “Need more, Jake. Please!”

“My fingers ain't cutting it, sweetheart?” he tsks.

“Please,” you mewl, desperately trying to buck your hips against his hand. “More.”

Jake knows he shouldn't. He knows how wrong this is. But fuck, the way you're begging, pussy al wet and ready, and Goddamn, he really should reflect upon the consequences of his moral decisions. But after. After he fucks you.

He removes his loincloth, showing you his thick, hardened cock, the tip a dark blue and oozing precum. Your eyes gleam as you study his girth, mouth almost watering at the sight.

Jake asks, “You sure you want this, kid?”

You nod, your voice a breathy whine. “Yes, please.”

He runs the head of his cock between your folds, gauging your reaction, and when you shudder, he groans. He slowly slides into you, his cock stretching your soft gummy walls, and you gasp.

“Fuck,” Jake grunts as your cunt flutters around him. “So fuckin' tight. And soaked, too.” Your slick is dripping down his cock, coating his balls and smearing onto his hips when he starts thrusting into you.

You're whining beneath him, unable to even talk. Jake glances down at you, his eyes scanning your pretty face, the way your eyelids flutter shut, the way your ears are folded back. He can't even care how wrong this is anymore: he's just thanking that you're too innocent to prevent him from using you.

“Does it feel good, sweet?” he questions, your pussy squelching as your arousal dribbles out of you.

“Mhmm!” you gasp. You grind your hips against Jake's, pussy sucking him in, your womb feeling like it's on fire with each brush of his cock to your cervix.

And Jake smirks. “You poor thing,” he mocks. “Look at you, suffering so much.” He cages your body under his, dragging his tongue across your jaw. “Almost makes me want to give you a permanent solution to this issue of yours.”

You moan softly. “What—wh' d'you mean?”

He laughs, biting your jaw and making you gasp. “What if I were to give you a baby, hm? Put my child in you.”

Your eyes snap open, looking terrified. “N-no, we can't.”

“It's a solution for both of us,” Jake continues, adoring the look of fear on your face. “You get rid of your heat, and I get to keep you all to myself, huh?”

“But—the others,” you gasp. What will they say?

“I don't care about the others,” he says sharply. “I'm asking you what you want.”

Your eyes meet his. Beneath the predatory amber of his eyes, you see something soft and warm, something caring.

“What do you want, sweetheart?” he asks. “You want me t'fill you up?”

“Please,” you say softly, nodding. “Give me a baby, Jake. Please!”

Jake groans, his cock twitching inside of you at the sound of your plead. Your cunt is so tight, almost begging him for his cum, and he's more than willing to give it to you.

Your womb is ablaze with the need to be full, your body thrumming with desire.

You mewl and gasp unintelligibly, your hands grabbing onto Jake's arms and digging your nails into his muscles.

He lowers his mouth to yours, his heart racing because, without taking everything that you're already doing, this feels more intimate than anything else.

His kiss is soft and gentle, slow, and it makes your heart flutter in your chest. It's probably the way it all suddenly feels so passionate and soft that has your orgasm right on the surface.

You clench around his cock, body shaking, and Jake groans. “You gonna come for me, girl? You gonna come on my cock?”

“Mhmm!” you mewl. “Yes, yes!”

And then you can feel the pressure within you coil tight, so tight, and suddenly your orgasm bursts within you, your slick gushing out of you.

“That's it,” Jake groans, his own release so close. “Fuck, 'm gonna fill you up now, girl. Fuck,” he hisses.

And then he's coming, spilling into you, and you gasp, shuddering as his cum fills your womb. You're breathing heavily, chest heaving up and down, and finally the ache deep within you dissipates.

Jake kisses your forehead, chucking softly. “You feelin' better, honey?”

You nod, out of breath, and Jake moves to pull out of you.

You squeeze his arm, keeping him inside of you. “Stay,” you manage, breathing heavily.

Jake nods. “Okay.” He rolls you two over so he's on his back and you're on top of him, and he holds you tight to his chest.

You fall asleep to the soft sound of his beating heart.

-----

@kamcrazy123 @yagirlheree @sweetllamaparadise @neytirishottie @crazy4books1

-----

Blog masterlist

[lavishl0ve]

hii guys im back 🤞 new lil fic 4 y’all, still open to suggestions and what not lol

⚠️ TW !!

enjoy! ❤️

———————————————————————-

Rubber wheels grind against the dirt path.

Johnny chuckles, a strand of his hair falling out whilst doing so, “You may be good Darlin’ but chu’ ain’t as good as me.” He remarks.

I bring my knees up to my chin in the passenger's seat, rolling my eyes.

“Let’s have a lil’ competition then hm?” I ask, pushing my nose out toward him.

He stares at me for a good long while with an amused look, completely disregarding the road. I was a joke to him. I could tell. I’ll prove tonight that I was better than him. I know I would.

“First person to bring someone back home wins.” I shrug, “…simple as that.”

A smirk appears on his face, implying he is bound to win. Little did he know.

I turn straight, re-focusing my attention on the mirror, checking myself. I retouch my lipstick, rub off my smudged eyeliner and take out my double braids I'd worn all day. My hair now subtly waved as Johnny pulled up to the bar. I jump out of the passenger seat, boots hitting the gravel, shortly following Johnny close behind as he walks into the bar we’d be in every Friday night. The place is more crowded than usual. Perfect.

Johnny bent down to my ear, “Good Luck Darlin’.” He scoffs, laughing as he walks off with his hands in his pockets, heading toward the booths.

I watch him stride away, scanning the room looking for prey whilst doing so. I needed a good candidate, not some old nolife drunk. I had to shatter his ego. Show him I was better. Capable.

And then I see him. Hunched over at the bar; I only see the back of his person, dirty boots, red and blue plaid shirt, blonde waved hair. And not to mention perfectly fit too. Time to put this plan into action.

I stride over, “How ya’ doin’?”

He glances over at me, dark eyebrows raising. His shirt is open by 3 buttons. It showed his strong chest, with a golden buckle accessorizing his worn out jeans and a slight sunburn grazing his scarred nose.

A warm smile painted his face, “Hey Mystery Girl.”

His voice was smooth and heavily accented. Kind of like Johnny. Dare I say… better? Jackpot.

He gestured to the seat next to him.

I pull out the stool, “Y/N.” I say, extending my hand.

He grips my hand, roughly shaking it. “Axel.”

I lean toward him, pushing my chest out slightly, “We sound good together Axel.”

He laughs, “That we do doll.”

I stare at him smiling, his eyes a hue of browns covered by the fluff of his eyelashes.

He gets nervous breaking the eye contact, taking another sip from his glass, “Lemme’ get you a drink Y/N-”

I cut him off as he was forming another sentence, “I’ll take whatever you think is good.”, giving him a sweet smile leaning closer.

An agreeable nod and he hollers the bartender over.

I redirect his attention towards me, “How’d ya’ get this?” I ask, grazing my fingers over his scarred nose.

Axel stares at me for a second before taking my fingers and holding them slightly below his face, “Some guy was coming onto ma’ sister..” he shrugs, “…took 2 years for it to heal.”

“Definitely did some damage, I'll give 'em’ that.” He laughs.

I squint closer at his pretty face, now noticing his nose hooked slightly to the right.

“It makes you look better.” I say, reaching over receiving my drink from the bartender.

Time passed throughout our small talk with a few drinks, I believe we were well enough conversed at this point. Talking to Axel had felt like talking to an old friend.

It was nice.

I hear the music start to rise. Signaling time for a line dance, this bar being famous for them. I grab his hand, dragging him over towards the floor giggling, his eyes widening. Axel looks apprehensive at first chuckling, acting like he had been caught with his hands raised.

“I don’t dance!” he laughs.

“C’mon” I exclaim, practically dragging him at this point.

I think the few drinks we’ve had have gotten to us, feelin’ all bubbly. We spin and tap our boots along with the crowd against the creaky wooden floor, getting shoved together from the pool of people. Line dance was always popular here.

It had been so lively, the music and people swaying together as one. Chest to chest with Axel the tension felt present, he smelt like amber, mixed with pine and firewood. With warm hands he takes my palm and twirls me. My back now pressed against his chest, he guides me in rhythm with his hips as our interlocked hands are pressed slightly above my stomach. I arch my back more slightly, pressing deeper into him. The crowd starts to disperse slightly as the song ends. Leaning my head back on Axel's broad shoulder I catch Johnny glaring at me basically grinding on him.

He sits in a booth with a tanned lady that has brunette hair and bright blue eyes. He gives her short replies, holding his eyes on me. I give him an “I told you so” eyebrow raise.

He had underestimated me too much.

I’m three steps ahead of him.

Shivers run through me when Axel's lips unexpectedly graze my neck, leaving soft kisses. I run my nails through his messy hair, still maintaining eye contact with Johnny.

“Wanna get outta here?” Axel whispers in my ear.

“Yeah.” I respond lightly, eyes locked onto Johnny’s.

“Yes I do.”

————————————————————————

I gaze at her from the booth, the lady in front of me chatting about her life, dog, something like that. None of it interests me.

I had just decided to entertain this “competition” of hers.

She perks up, placing her elbows on the bar counter squeezing them together to show off her chest. That guy she’s talking to is obviously into it. I scoff refocusing my attention to the girl, she stirs her drink with its straw, talking about her past in the city. I act engaged asking a few, basic questions but my eyes don't wander away from Y/N and that guy. Every movement they make I seem to glance back over. Each time she touches his arm, or each time he caresses her thigh I grip my glass a tad more.

I don’t like people touching my things.

She stands, dragging him to the dance floor.

“Oo we should dance!” The girl in front of me interrupts.

Her piercing blue eyes stare at me in response.

“Not my typa’ thing.”

With a light “oh” she goes back to sipping her martini. I peer through the heavy crowd looking for my girl. There she was dancin’ with him, grindin’ against him. Letting his filthy ol’ hands feel all over her. She knows what she’s doing; she’s staring straight at me.

“I’ll be right back sweetheart.”

I excuse myself, walking to the back alley, opening the exit door. Pulling out a cigarette and lighting it. I puff the smoke. Over, and over, and over again. I keep replaying them in my mind. I became fed up. This game was stupid anyways.

Throwing the cigarette to the throw I mush it into the concrete with the heel of my boot, before stepping back inside, knowing that I'm going to be dragging Y/N home.

Ripping my lady away from that filth.

When I step back inside they aren’t there.

————————————————————————

I had insisted to Axel we go back to the family home. It didn’t take him much convincing. I was afraid his older jeep couldn’t sustain the speed he was going, the least it was could be 70.

“Take this right up here.” I say pointing at our gate.

“Yes ma’am” he nods.

I giggle at his remark, pulling up through the familiar road. Johnny's car isn’t there. I won.

I smile to myself, Axel taking note.

“You look so pretty when you smile.” He complimented, turning off the engine.

I’m slightly taken aback by his compliment, he sounded genuine, something I’d never gotten with Johnny. I blush, his hand grazing my cheek. He stares at me in this suspended silence, twirling a strand of my hair. Axel was like a sweet puppy, admiring me.

l felt my breathing become heavier as the air in his car changed. How far can this go? How far did I want it to go?

How far would Johnny let me go…?

All I knew was that I wanted to rub salt into his wounds.

I grabbed Axel's face, connecting his lips with mine, he was gentle and slow, large hands cupping my face as his lips moved. I climbed over the console that had separated our seats. Straddling him, wrapping my arms around his neck, I push harder, deepening the kiss. He seemed to get the motion picking up his speed, movement getting sloppy. He sits up, and grabs my ass as my hands run throughout his hair.

I pant, breaking away for a breath, “Let’s go inside.”

He reaches back out for me as I crawl out of the car, him following short behind as he reconnects the kiss. I stride backward, leading him inside as his hands grip into my hips. I walk us up the stairs into my room, instantly removing my tank top, Axel watches as I throw the fabric to the ground.

I give him a motion with my finger to stride over and he doesn’t waste a second, reigniting the kiss, unbuttoning my jean shorts slowly. He slips his hands under my bra, feeling me as he works his way to the band, unclipping it. I remove my jeans for the spilt moment we’re separated, helping him with his shirt in the process. Pushed against a wall, I wrap my legs around his waist, Axel making his way down my neck. I moan lightly from the sucking sensation below the left of my jaw as his fingers grazed the fabric of my panties. Saliva spills from his sweet mouth trailing down my neck.

A grunt from him.

I’m lost at the moment.

then realize.

I look down, red flowing from his mouth with that dark, familiar shadow hovering behind him.

Axel's body collapsed onto mine, I caught him barely able to hold up his weight. The wood boards croak lightly as Johnny stepped closer, observing. His face is painted by the dark, I’m unable to see his expression, yet I know he can see mine.

Fear.

He creeps closer, pausing for a second in front of me before throwing Axel's body to the side. Like he was nothing.

Johnny grabs me with a force I’ve never withstood from him before, slamming me against the wall; I hear the drywall crack. I yelp slightly from the impact, the harsh grip on my neck. A sudden piercing makes its way next to my ear, puncturing it, barely missing my face. I could feel the coldness of the metal. His knife now embedded into the wall, a warning.

Face to face, he chews his gum slowly, taking satisfaction from my fear.

“I don’t like this little game of yours-” Johnny growled.

“…doll.” He says in sarcasm.

Slightly teasing Axel.

“Johnny stop.“ I try to plead.

He ignores me, “You think this is funny or somethin’?”

I question myself, “No- I liked him’.”

He grabs me by my shoulders, knocking me deeper into the wall, he leans down, shoving face into mine.

“You ain’t nobody’s but mine.”

A sudden pressure on my left hip, “Do I have to remind you?” He threatens.

A prick and skin breaks as he pushes the tip of his blade farther. My eyes water slightly from the pain. Johnny tilts his head. I don’t submit to him. There was a reason I wanted to prove myself.

He waits for my response, getting impatient with his furrowed eyebrows. My silence speaks for itself.

He swiftly dragged the blade down, pushing harder before the movement. I collapsed to the ground from the speed at which he did so, shrieking. Crying. My leg had felt as if it had been ripped apart. He watches me, helpless. Squeezing the endless flow of crimson emerging from my insides; my hands are now painted red.

He cowers down on my level, grabbing my wrist.

“Do I?”

The pain had been relentless, I shook my head, vision blurred by tears.

He grasps my head with his gloved hands, wiping away my tears, so gently…

“Look at me when you say it.”

“No!- you don’t.” I sob.

His eyes squinted, “Not good enough for me darlin’.” He clicks his tongue.

“I wanted chu’ to mean it.”

“Not just outta desperation.”

He hovers over me, silencing my cries with his left hand. His knife drags along my thigh, working its way up slowly to the incision he had made. The cold metal conflicts with the burning on my leg. I flinch.

“I’ll be more gentle this time.” Johnny whispers.

He leans into me more, pushing for leverage against my mouth, trying to get a better angle for his “art”.

He builds pressure, breaking skin but not incisioning deep like before, only enough to scar. It was more manageable this time, yet the previous cut was all I could feel.

Horizontally he slices. Reconnecting the line at the bottom and hooking the blade upwards. J.

I fight against the pain, biting into the leather he wears. He stares at his masterpiece for a second before stepping a few inches back. I lay there, still helpless. Drained of life.

Grabbing me by my waist he hurls me up, trying to get me to stand, although I couldn't feel my legs.

He holds me there, knowing that if he let go I'd collapse once more. He eyes me slowly up and down, I look away guilty, tears running down my face. Johnny leans in slowly, planting a soft kiss on the side of my lips, his tongue connecting the path to my tears. Johnny licks my tears, saliva replaces saltiness. His gentle kisses trail down toward my neck. His left forearm arm now beneath my chest to hold me up whilst his other hand roams free. His lips meet way to the incisions; Johnny cleans the scarlet mess he had created- savoring the flavor before reconnecting his lips with mine. The iron floods into my mouth. The taste I once learned to get used to felt strange when it had been my own.

He breaks away, hand softly caressing my jaw, “You know I love you.” He breathes.

I searched his face, met only with his adoration of me. The pain suddenly washed over me; ironic how it wasn’t physical.

Only the guilt of my actions.

I lightly nod, falling into him.

“I love you..” I shakily reciprocate.

Love.

He expresses that.

Although in a devastating way,

I know he speaks the truth of it.

because otherwise-

I would’ve been dead.

[beebotea]

hey, are you listening? — part 09

pairing : college au!xiao x f!reader . summary : in which uni students decipher vague tweets and emotions... + ie: second-year students y/n and xiao are forced to work through their term project (and feelings) as their friends attempt to meddle with their love lives ‘for the greater good’ . cw : swearing, slut-shaming, suggestive, reader she/her pronouns .

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09. accidental sleep over party

act 1, scene 1

“Y/N, did u like the food?” Scaramouche looked up from his phone over to the couch where his friends all sat. “Was it your first time eating authentic Inazuman food?”

“Authentic my ass… Inazuma doesn’t use any of the Sumeru-based spices that you put in!”

“Shut the fuck up, Heizou, just admit you’re a little bitch boy who can’t eat spices.”

“Hmm? Yeah~ yummy yummy, mmm… ramen.” Y/N slurred amidst their bickering.

To her left, Kazuha chuckled as he took another sip of his drink. “And here I thought Xiao was the lightweight. If anything, she’s significantly worse... I didn’t even think that was possible.”

“Man alive, give her a break. It was her first time trying saké.”

“I should probably get her home…” Xiao’s eyes never left the view of her hands playing with his fingers. “Come on, Y/N. I have to get you home before it’s too late or Hu Tao would kill me…”

The teal haired boy tried to wiggle his way up to tug the tipsy girl away from the sofa.

“Noooo… wanna stay ‘lil longer…” She looked up at him pleadingly. “At least… lemme be sober when I get home.”

Xiao ruffled his hair, a little stressed, but unable to deny the puppy eyes peering up at him with a pout.

“Fine.” He managed to mumble before prying his eyes away from her.

“Well, then I guess I’ll get going,” Scaramouche spoke up from behind them, “it’s the weekend so I’ll be visiting my mom and aunt. See ya. No funny business in our room when I’m gone.” He grabbed his keys off the counter before starting towards the door.

“And one more thing,” he paused. “Don’t break anything.”

“Pfft, yeah yeah, we’re not kids, Scara.” Heizou rolled his eyes.

“I’m not talking about you guys. I’m talking about that one.” Scaramouche pointed at Y/N, who promptly stuck her tongue out at him in response. “And give her water or something. Anyways, bye.” He closed the door behind him.

“Can we play Pokémon again?” Y/N called to Xiao, who was grabbing her a drink of water from the fridge.

“Sure. Do you guys want to join us?” He looked over at his two other roommates.

“No it’s alright, you two go ahead. I wanted to finish this show before I go to bed.” Kazuha smiled at them.

“Yeah, same here! Plus I have to work on a case study due on Sunday so I don’t want to procrastinate too much.” Heizou added.

“Alright then. We’ll be in my room. Come on, Y/N.”

—

act 2, scene 1

“Feeling better now?” Xiao asked as he continued hunting for shinies with Y/N on the Switch.

“Yeah… at least I think I’m pretty sober…”

“Alright. Tell me when you want to go home then, okay?”

“It’s only nine. Can we leave around 11? I’m sure my roommates won’t mind.”

He chuckled. “Of course, whenever you’d like.”

As they continued to travel around the map together in their virtual world, Y/N got a notification from Twitch.

-

ModernBard is live: Escaping with Cyno!

Streaming Escape the Backrooms

-

“Oh, Venti is streaming!” She showed Xiao her phone screen.

“Did you want to watch?”

“Can we?”

“Of course.” He said as he got off the of the bed before powering on his PC and wirelessly connecting it to his mini projector for them to watch.

She observed as the wall adjacent to Scaramouche’s bed lit up with Venti’s signature waiting screen. She shuffled around to lay on her stomach, facing the screen as Xiao got back onto the bed after turning off the lights and mimicked her. He pulled the blanket over her legs before settling back down.

“Cozy?”

“Yupp! Thank you.”

-

Hey guys! Oh, damn there’s a lot of you… how have you all been? My friend Cyno will be joining me to play Escape the Backrooms. I think I put his twitch somewhere in the title… if not then the mods can drop his stuff in the chat.

Yeah, we’ve been meaning to play it but Venti said he was worried about pissing himself on camera if he played alone.

I did not!

Did too.

Tch… So anyways! We’re going to try to get through as many levels as we can in one sitting. Some of our friends will be joining us as well if we have to restart!

Okay. I am ready.

Same. Hi Childe, thanks for the sub. I look cute? You too, buddy.

Oh! Hi Y/N, hi Xiao! How’s studying? Ooooh nice. Thanks for tuning in! Yeah, haha OHMYGODWHATTHEFUCK AAAAA—

Venti shut the fuck up it’s just the loading screen.

Oh.

I think I tinkled myself.

-

The two continued watching their friends run through the thrilling game, as Venti continued to occasionally scream to let out his anxiety or to piss off Cyno while the latter would make panicked jokes to calm himself.

The stream in its entirety was entertaining as the two natural born “comedians” (more so Venti than Cyno) ventured through the creepy levels. However, Y/N couldn’t help but feel tired from the day’s events.

Studying was mentally taxing… Eating, drinking, and conversing with Xiao and his roommates also took a lot of energy. To end it all off, gaming—although relaxing—also took a certain amount of brain power and concentration.

The warmth radiating beneath Xiao’s blanket shared between the two project mates called to them, calming their senses. Despite the jump scare at the end of the stream, Y/N and Xiao laid there unbothered and sound asleep.

—

act 3, scene 1

—

a/n: act 3, scene 1 is a teaser for the next day :)

—

taglist  —

@ashhh-14 @sanghyuksgasolinestationscream @yuminako @bananasquash​ @scaramoo​  @lovely028​ ​@apinu @yukii-1 @ttalgi @yelleloww​ @bobaducky​ @sukunasrealgf

—

[spectrechosts]

Misc. Short Demon Stories

Untitled stories about demons that weren't written as part of my Vandalize series. Second one probably fits into it though.

"What'cha guys watching?"

"One a them creepy girlchildren found Zep's summoning circle in a book, she's trying to make offerings."

"Oh shit, lemme see."

The three demons stood over a misty scrying pool, and in it's waters watched a young girl chanting in her treehouse, summoning circle etched into the wood, a dead bird in the center.

"Nice. Love getting summoned by weird little girls, they want the best shit."

"Last time I got one she gave me three baby teeth and 15 canadian dollars in exchange for making her good at drawing Inuyasha."

"Did you give her the whole show or just the character?"

The demon shrugged.

"I made her good at drawing in general."

"Softie. You gonna pick up or what, Zep?"

"Nah. I mean, if she had killed the bird it'd be one thing, but she just found it on the sidewalk."

"She's like ten, you want her to kill a bird?"

"I want her to do something. Prick her finger, I dunno. Hang on, I'm getting another call."

The scrying pool shifted to show a man etching the summoning circle into the flesh of a headless corpse.

"Oh, this fucking guy again. Hate getting serial killers."

"Ooh I'm decapitating people and carving occult symbols into their flesh, look at me! Dickheads. Get new material."

"Go back to the kid, this sucks."

The pool shifted back to the treehouse, where the child was dripping blood from the tip of her finger onto the dead bird.

"YEAAHHH!"

"NICE!"

"Okay okay, I'll go see what she wants."

Zep dissipated into smoke, and the two others waited, the scrying pool no longer showing the child now that the summons had been answered. After a few long minutes, she reappeared.

"Well?"

"The pact has been made. Her parents will agree to get her a puppy. And in exchange…"

She took a stack of foil packets out of her sleeve.

"Pokemon cards."

"Siiiiiiiick."

~

"I uh, I think that there's been um, some kind of mistake?" Kaylee said, looking very intently at the ceiling of her room.

"It's okay hun, don't be shy! Lotta people do this, it's no big thing." Said the succubus now lounging in the center of her room, clad only in a-

To call it a slutty nurse outfit was an understatement. This was slutty costume design on a level mortal minds could never dream to achieve.

"No, no there's actually been a mistake." Kaylee said, her face burning. "You're very pretty, but I was looking for uh, actual medical help."

"And you got it, doll! Hell's very own gender affirming care agency, at your service!" The succubus beamed at her. "How can we help you today?"

Kaylee flicked her eyes back to the demon, made sure she was seeing correctly.

"You look like a succubus?"

"What kind of demon do you think should be handlin' your sexy bits? Gettin' you all prettied up? Trust me doll, when it comes to fleshcraft there ain't nobody better! Whaddaya want?"

Kaylee swallowed. She really hadn't expected this to actually work.

"Um. Just, you know. Girl I guess. Make me a girl."

"Gotta give me more to work with than that, hon. What're you having trouble with?" The demoness said, slinking up to her and throwing an arm around her shoulder familiarly. "Tell your pal Vicky how mortal medicine's failed ya, I'll see what I can do."

"I, I dunno, all of it I guess?" Kaylee shrank inward, clutching her own elbows. She had never said any of this out loud to anyone before. "It's just so daunting, you know? Trying to get psychiatrists to put you on waiting lists to get on pills that'll take years to do anything. I want it to be easy."

"Well don't you worry toots, we pride ourselves on being easy."

Kaylee cracked a tiny smile, she had walked right into that one.

"Alright I'm gonna ask you some questions, just answer as honestly as you can."

Vicky poofed to the other side of the room, sitting in Kaylee's computer chair with a clipboard in one hand and a cigarette holder in the other. "So tell me doll, what kinda timeline you looking for here?" She said, taking a drag while she waited for Kaylee's answer.

"Fast, I guess? Faster than it would be otherwise."

"How important is retaining a resemblance to your current appearance, family, etc."

"Um. Depends on the end result I guess?"

"How important is it that people not realize your transition was magically aided?"

"Not very?"

"Would you want people to remember you as always having been a girl?"

"You can do that?"

"Sure can, hon. Expensive though."

"…Depends on the person, I guess?"

"Mm. Okay, you're giving me very noncommittal answers here sugar. Want me to just run through the basic contracts for you?"

"S-Sorry. Sure."

"Okay. Cheap or expensive first?"

"Cheap."

"Ugh, c'mon doll, show some moxie! We're doin' magic here! You deserve more than the bare minimum!"

"Are you just saying that because you want to eat my soul?"

"Ehehe, a lady never tells." Vicky said coyly.

"Cheap, please."

"Fiddlesticks."

[lilgarbitch]

Hi!! I’m super interested in you’re like lore? I guess. Where did you get your idea and motivation for running in circles? xx

GAH that’s such a sweet question🥰

(Edit: this is a jumbled mess i apologize)

Okay, it’s a little embarrassing, but I guess the best way to phrase ‘the lore’ is personal experience.

For Y/N’s character, I heavily over exaggerated my own interests. My life is run by music. I’m a (mediocre) vocalist and song writer, and always had a fun little dream planned out of being able to tour, so that part had been on the back burner for a while. (I’ve even thrown in a few lyrics from my own ‘songs’ in the story🤭which made me really excited to keep writing this.) Her personality is formed from a lot of different characters I’ve read, plus ideas of my own to create more tension in the story (like her being a cute little reckless idiot)

Now, for the back story. (Only one person knows this, so I’m both excited and scared to tell yall😂) I had liked songs from Bad Omens for a while now. I wasn’t obsessed with them, but I enjoyed their music. They caught my attention after covid and I had their music in my playlists, so when I saw that they were going to a festival I had tickets for, I was super excited to see them. The day of their show comes and I’m standing there all giddy and shit, excited to finally see their whole act in person. And then Noah walked on stage. Lemme tell ya, ya girl fucking FROZE😭Like something fully short-circuited in my brain. Couldn’t tell you why or what happened, fucker just had me standing there like 😃 as I watched.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so starstruck😂 And that flipped that little gremlin switch in my brain, making me fall back in to being a fangirl for the first time in years, which obviously led me to read fanfiction again.

As I read a few, I had the plot of RIC slowly forming in my head. One of those “Oh I wish I could find a story that fit exactly what I wanted to read” plots. Because who doesn’t want a story they can semi-relate to? After restarting my tumblr page and spending a good bit of time on here, I very fortunately had the chance to get to know some really sweet writers, and they were who helped push me to actually take this plot and put it into writing.

Mainly one specific writer. I got pulled to her story when scrolling for new ones to read because it was the closest thing to the plot I had in my head and I ATE THAT SHIT UP!!! And it made me realize I needed to start working on mine.

Thank you @thefallennightmare for writing Just Pretend🥰

Now, obviously this story didn’t actually happen. But that moment when Noah’s presence fully broke my brain was something that had stuck with me, so I thought, “That would make a cute ass soulmate based plot.” I built up that part of the story, then built Y/N’s character, and everything after that is just what my gremlin brain wants to write.

Extra note: I have always loved to create scenes and stories, so I have a few cute scenes written in my notes app, completely unrelated to any fandom or story, that were kind of there ‘if I ever started writing again,’ and one PERFECTLY fits into this story. So I’m SO EXCITED to be able to actually write it out now that I have characters and a plot.

AGAIN, THANK YOU FOR THIS ASK🥰🥰🥰

[daincrediblegg]

okay your turn if nobody else has asked: TOP FIVE JH CHARACTERS GO

... girl... how does one choose? how does one??? when there are so many beautiful boys??? ok. OK I'll give it a shot.

5. Captain Crow - The Sea Beast This film is just incredible on every front. One of my favorite concept artists worked on it (which I did not know until a few weeks ago but now that I know I feel like kicking myself because I REALLY SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEIR STYLE WELL ENOUGH BY NOW). But I remember watching this, and screaming when the credits began to roll because WAIT?!?!?! THAT WAS JARED HARRIS??? OH!!! WHAT A DELIGHT!!! I LOVE THAT GUY!!!! (oh babygirl wait a few months it's gonna hit you so bad). He's great. I hope we see more of him in the sequel that would be great for me.

4. Hari Seldon Honestly. What a little shit. "But Egg," you might ask "If he's such a little shit why is he on here?" well. He's hot. Really I am not over how hot this dude is. I know I couldn't fix him not in a million years. But idk. Something about him always makes my brain go brrr. So he's on here. Also I just love how fucking atypically written this show is and I have a wee soft spot for asimov. They didn't have to cast Jared as Hari and make him unbelievably hot. But they did. And he's so enigmatic. I love that.

3. John Lennon Egg's love for Jared Harris Origins. I was a Beatles girlie, ok? I'm not ashamed to admit that. It was my introductory fandom experience at the ripe old age of baby, and I really ate it up. I remember going into this movie being like "oh it's some dumb TV movie about John and Paul how good can it be?" Very good, as it turns out. And having assigned myself a John Lennon girlie I literally could never get over this depiction. The mannerisms, the fucking tripped-out way he philosophizes in conversation, the softness, and ofc the old friends tension. Jared got it all. Of course I'd seen him in stuff here and there, but this was the one that cemented him as a beloved actor in my mind for me (I literally re-wound the kiss scene as well like 20 times don't judge me but that awakened some stuff in me). Been following him ever since.

2. Lane Pryce - Mad Men This dude broke me for real. I didn't get into Mad Men until college, and binged it all on my friend's hulu account. And lemme tell ya. Did NOT see his final episode coming. Did not. And it made me genuinely weep. He was a highlight in the show. He was one of the only guys I could actually say is a good dude in that show, and he deserved so much better than he got in the end. I look at him and I'm just like... leave ur wife. Leave your job. Lets just go out of this capitalistic hellscape. I want to make him Well. I will love him forever for how he just completely destroyed me.

1.Francis Crozier / Valery Legasov - HA! you thought I was not going to tie them? WRONG! I can't keep these bad bitches apart.

Francis really needs no explanation at this point. I am so actually genuinely in love with him I'm writing a whole ass gothic romance novel of a fic for him, as you all know (and which has summarily turned out a BANGER of a modern AU as well). I made a bloody self-insert oc for him. Gothic Cinema is literally my favorite genre and Francis is the most Gothic Hero of all time, honestly (well besides Valery obviously). The serotonin he continually gives me makes my meds redundant. He is my sweet husband who I love with my whole life and that's that.

And Valery? sorry you can't put a babygirl of a man like that in front of me and not expect that I would want to jump his bones like? Not only is the constant existential dread relatable, but as much as people tell him he's not brave, he IS without a doubt, and honestly, just by virtue of uttering the most iconic logline ever fucking created he deserves this spot on this list. Both of these dudes make my soul ascend in a certain way not just with how brilliantly they were written, but with how incredibly Jared executed them (for which I want to kill the academy for not giving him awards on either). Top Beloveds forever and ever and ever amen.

[sunnyie-eve]

4 | In Zombieland

Series: A Zombie's Serenity 

Paring: Zed Necrodopolis x OFC Buchanan!

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: Might be a few mistakes, and I'm using Brenna D'Amico as how the OC's looks

| MASTERLIST |

~~~

Sneaking out of the house was kind of a difficult job for Serenity. She had to make it believable that she was going to bed super early and didn't want anyone bugging her without seeming suspicious. Quietly she sneaks out her window and carefully climbs down and runs off before any neighbors can see her. 

"Hey. You made it." Zed meets her at the barrier. 

"Yeah, I just had to make it seem like I was going to bed this early and sneak out." She explains looking around. 

"Well it's worth it because you're going to love this." He takes her hand into his and leads the way. While they ride the lift to where the party was, Serenity sees Zed's wrist was bugging him. 

"You okay? What's bothering you?" She looks at him worried. 

"I have to mess with my Z-Band to win games." He sighs. 

"Isn't that dangerous? I get you're doing it so zombies will be accepted but is your health worth the risk?" She asks as they arrive and get out. "This is place is cool." She steps out looking around. 

"It's a chance to get loose and be ourselves." She follows behind him. 

"So this is a celebration for all of you? Winning the football games?" She looks around. 

"Yeah, we really needed a win. Zombie tongue. We have a rich language. 23 different words for brains." He sees her look at the wall. 

"23? No one could make up their mind over 50 years?" She laughs making Eliza hear her. 

"I had a feeling you would have brought her. Welcome to our Zombie Mash." Eliza gives her a smile. 

"Aw, it started! Come on." Zed runs off making Serenity follow the crowd.

"Hey, welcome to Zombieland. It's a party, go ahead, everybody dance. Do the draggy leg, you surely can. Be part of the team, gotta wave the flag. Let your freak flag fly." Zed walks away so Serenity follows him to watch. "Gotta stare when we pass by. Not your average guy. But you know I'm fly. So alive just on a different side. Look in my eyes. We're the same but different. Just like you, I got hopes and wishes. Itchin' to show the world what they're missing. It's our time, yeah, it's time to flip it, what?"

"I'm about to show you." Zed goes over to Eliza. 

"What you gon' show me?" She asks. 

"Guess nobody told you." He tells her. 

"You ain't gotta tell me." She sasses him.

 "I'm about to put in work." Zed points at himself. 

"Listen, this is my turf." Eliza says as Zed moves so Serenity follows to watch more.

Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, you a fan Understand this is Zombieland Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man with the plan Lemme do my dance

Bam! (Bam) You're in Zombieland (What?) I'm in Zombieland (What?) We're in Zombieland Watch me do it like bam (Bam) You're in Zombieland (What?) I'm in Zombieland (What?) We're in Zombieland Watch me do it like bam

Serenity watches the show amazed and enjoys it smiling. "Ready for action, yeah, we 'bout to blow up. Party's going down, but we're about to go up. We got your back, no need to have worries." Eliza joins making Serenity cheer for her. 

"Now we're all cool, at first it was scurry. And we can do a lot with a little. Call on your friends when you're caught in the middle. And you should do the same like I do the same. You should be yourself, it's the coolest thing." Zed puts his arm around Serenity's shoulder. 

"I'm about to show you." Eliza walks Serenity off. 

"What you gon' show me?" She asks. 

"Guess nobody told you." Eliza adds. 

"Girl, you don't know me." Serenity laughs. 

"I'm about to put in work." Eliza walks off. 

"Listen, this is our turf." Zed jumps.

Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, you a fan Understand this is Zombieland Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man with the plan Lemme do my dance

Bam! (Bam) You're in Zombieland (What?) I'm in Zombieland (What?) We're in Zombieland Watch me do it like bam (Bam)

"You're in Zombieland. I'm in Zombieland. We're in Zombieland. Watch me do it like bam!" Serenity joins in on the main floor before running to see the break down. Zed runs putting a jacket on her then dragging her to join with him.

Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, you a fan Understand this is Zombieland Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man with the plan Lemme do my dance Bam! Oh man, oh man, I'm the man Bet ya can't do it like I can Bam! Oh man, oh man, you a fan Understand this is Zombieland Bam!

Zed ends up leaving Serenity alone so she walks around and hears Zoey cheer in the distance so she watches her. "I wasn't doing anything. Certainly not cheering. Please don't tell anyone." She drops them. 

"Why'd you stop? It was a good cheer." Serenity walks over to her. 

"Did you like it?" Zoey sits next to her. 

"Of course I did. I really like the Zombies aren't vile part because you're telling the truth." Serenity smiles sitting next to her. 

"That cheer makes me happy." Zoey tells her. 

"Me too. You're great at cheerleading, Zoey. I'm sure you will have no problems getting on the squad when it's time." Serenity pats the top of her head. 

"Thanks, but my pet Zander doesn't seem that impressed." Zoey pouts. 

"Well, he should be. I think he's just jealous he can't cheer as good as you." She says making Zoey smile.

"Zed's freaking out he can't find you." Eliza finds Serenity first. 

"Well he's the one that left me alone." She laughs as Zed shows up. 

"You found her. Zoey? Whoa... what are you doing here?" He asks seeing his little sister. 

"Please, I'm not gonna miss a Zombie Mash." She pouts. 

"Zoey..." He says her name. 

"Come on. Who's a good boy?" Zoey gets on her knees clapping her hands. Zed crosses his arms before letting out a a ruff making Serenity smile as he imitates a dog. 

"Me." He goes up to Zoey, who tells him good boy. 

"All right, all right. I'll take you home. Zed's gotta make sure Serenity gets out of here." Eliza picks up Zoey. 

"And I gotta make sure I sneak back into my room hoping no one catches me." Serenity says handing Zoey her pompoms and Zander. 

"Good luck on that." Eliza leaves. 

"Night guys." Serenity waves.

-

"It's really sweet you act like a dog for Zoey. I wish zombies were allowed to have pets. It's stupid people think you'll eat them after all this time." I tell him as I look at all the lights. "What exactly is this place?" I ask him. 

"It's a zombie light garden." He tells me. 

"I should have guessed that." I giggle. 

"Let's go for a walk in the park." He puts his hand out to me so I take it.

"I know it might be crazy, but did you hear the story?" Zed slowly walks around. 

"I think I heard it vaguely." I join looking at all the lights. 

"A girl and a zombie." He looks back at me. 

"Oh, tell me more, boy, sounds like a fantasy." I slowly follow him. "Oh, what could go so wrong with a girl and a zombie?" We just stare at each other. 

"You're from the perfect paradise and I'm living on the darker side." He walks backwards away from me. 

"Ooh, I've got a feeling, if you get to know me." I follow him smiling. 

"Right from the start you caught my eye. And something inside me came to life." He sends me a wink. "Ooh, I've got a feeling, if you get to know me." He finally stops walk backwards.

Someday, this could be, this could be ordinary Someday, could we be something extraordinary? You and me side by side, out in the broad daylight If they laugh, we'll say we're gonna be someday Someday, someday We're gonna be someday Someday, someday We're gonna be someday

We stop walking around and just face each other standing awfully close together. "I love how you embraced your hair and don't care about things." Zed plays with a white strand that came loose. 

"Why should I care when it harms a whole population of people? And my hair makes me, me. Why hide part of me?" I slightly smile. 

"You're beautiful." He starts to leans in but we get cut off by Z-Patrol. 

"Go!" I shove him away and he runs. 

"Zombie! Freeze! Turn around." I recognize the voice. 

"Hey Gus..." I awkwardly laugh. 

"Serenity, what are you doing here? This is a hotbed for Zombie activity. It's not safe for humans. Come on, let's get you home." He tells me and I groan.

Back home my parents weren't happy and Bucky loved that I got caught. "Told you I'd didn't believe she went to bed." He tells them. 

"Bucky, go to bed." Our dad tells him so he leaves the room. 

"You snuck out?" My mom gets on me. 

"You know how dangerous it is out there?" My dad asks and lets Gus leave. 

"This town is full of monstrous zombies. What were you up to?" She asks me. 

"They aren't monstrous." I make them gasp. 

"They tried to bite your grandfather's ear off, young lady." My father points at me. 

"Now why did you sneak out?" My mother crosses her arms. "You tell us or no more cheer." She adds. 

"I already quit remember..." I laugh. 

"Tell us or we'll send you away like Bucky brought up since you act out now." My dad adds. 

"Fine, I was with a boy. Now you know. Can I go to bed?" I try to leave the room but they won't let me. 

"We need to meet this boy or we will send you off to another school for the rest of the year. Go to bed."

[katsukikitten]

I'm probs not gonna shut the fuck up about this so block the tag

I forgot this mother fucker said believe it after every breath 😂

Tamari is so fucking bad ass.

Also they need to reanimate this shit 😂 I'm HOLLARING

Can't wait to see homeboy get his arms ripped off 😔

Or for Lee to drop his weights or Gaara fucking SAND COFFIN

Uh damn this one lady was cool AF I cannot remember her name I hope it tells me

YUHI!!! I SHIPPED HER WITH SMOKER MAN

Also SO EXCITED TO SEE SHIKAMARU

"what a drag" bro if I had that shadow fucking jutsu it'd be bad okay. Cause "DANCE BITCH DANCE" before they die by their own hand ya know hehe

Sakura and Naruto's dynamic makes me laugh, watching in dub by the way cause that's all we had back in the day 😔

Girl Sakura I do not wanna hear you say you can't keep up am with Sasuke. Beat his ass sis BEAT HIS ASS some of these kids like like five years older omg

What is this fucking plot???

Bro everyone shitting on Sakura including herself. Lemme rewrite some plot points 😭

Damn Sasuke getting one shotted by a fuckin 20 year old

WHAT ARE THESE HAIR STYLES

I FUCKING LAUGHED OUT LOUD WHEN SAKURA WAS FAKE CRYING OVER FAKE SASUKE 😂

I used to kinda like Nenji too.

Who okayed these character designs DAMN THEY JUST SLAPPED TEN TEN

Again what the fuck is this plot ass, ass transitions

"delicate little girls don't belong here" boy shut the fuck up.

NARUTO LAUGHING AT SAKURA REJECTING ROCK LEE IM HOWLING

Again their dynamic 😂

Sasuke making a clueless face when rock Lee hits on her

Bro Sasuke saying it's a freak show? My boy your hair.

Everyone asking Sasuke his name like his name isn't the fucking fan on his back 🙄

[zaradrawsyourmom]

Rant About Netflix’s Babysitters Club Adaption

………why.Just….why…….

ok so context. The Babysitters Club is a book series by Ann M. Martin. In 2020, Netflix made the mistake of making it a modern reboot. I hate this reboot with a passion, and I will now explain why.

Where All The Kiddos At?

With a name like The Babysitters Club, you would really expect there to be……y’know….babies? In this show, the main focus is not even babysitting. It’s boys. Ok, lemme explain. I’ve found for some reason this show happens to be focused on the main characters getting love interests. It’s litteraly in the SECOND EPISODE. And they’ve also turned Kristy into a snobby, know it all. She acts like we’re all in the military. In episode 5 when Dawn asks for babysitting advice she tells her to be…sterner…to literal 4 year olds. Ah yes, it’s a great idea to talk to children like they’ve just committed arson. And in episode 7 Stacey goes on a week long babysitting gig with Mary Anne and falls for a older lifeguard. And by the end of the episode she still finds love. That was not necessary….and the love interest is supposedly Byron who in the book part of the family she’s babysitting. I can’t remember his name sorry. But….in the book Byron is 10….Stacey is in like the 7th grade. So…idk what that’s about, but it’s giving off underage relationships…..ew. (Also in the show Kristy hits puberty. Also wasn’t necessary…)

Everything’s Been Changed

Another thing. Everyone in the show’s been changed. They change everyone’s names and it’s hard to try and guess who’s who since I keep up with the comic series. In this segment I’m discussing some things I find very weird that we’re changed.

In episode 4 Mary Anne has a falling out with the club. This storyline is pretty accurate to the book but for one thing. One very weird, creepy, why was this show green lit idea. So in the episode there’s this girl named Bailey who Mary Anne sits for. And while babysitting her she finds out that Bailey, the presumed 6 year old, IS TRANSGENDER. Yes you heard me. Children are now coming out. Just to be clear I don’t have anything against queer people, but how would a child even know what lgbtq is? Bailey needs to tell this to her parents, not a babysitter who she barely knows. Children should NOT be making these statements. I didn’t watch the whole episode, but I bet she’s one of those “oH I DoN’t LiKe wEaRinG dResSes oR pInK oR fEmInIe StUfF” kind of characters if ya know what I mean.

In episode 14 Jessi (the new member it the group) babysits for a Ryan’s World knockoff. In the middle of the episode he’s sad because he didn’t get some role on a tv show so they gets ice cream. Now, the interesting thing about this episode is that in the original book series, this kid is instead deaf and Jessi is learning to sign to understand him. So….why was this changed again? It could’ve been an awesome way to portray the deaf community and give people who are unaware of these real world problems on how deaf people look differently at the world, and could be shown as casual representation in television, but…I digress. Your loss, Netflix.

To conclude, this show should not be called the Babysitters Club. It should be called the We’re So Woke About What Girls Are Into These Days And Sacrificed a Whole Show Storyline Showing That Fact Club, or the WSWAWGAITDASWSSSTF Club for short. Y’know what..never mind. It’s still a mouthful to say anyways.

That’s it baiiiiiiii